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Teaching Peace in
Application
“You have
very truly remarked that if we are to reach real peace in
this world, and if we are to carry on a real war against
war, we shall have to begin with the children and if they
will grow up in their natural innocence, we won’t have to
struggle, we won’t have to pass fruitless idle
resolutions, but we shall go from love to love and peace
to peace, until at last all the corners of the world are
covered with that peace and love for which, consciously,
or unconsciously, the whole world is hungering..”
~ From a letter of
Mahatma Gandhi, November 19, 1931, to Maria Montessori.
 So
how do you translate innocence to peacemaker? If war is
embedded in the genetic material of human beings, isn’t it
just contrary to our nature to be peaceful?
No.
Andrew Kutt,
the Founder and Head of the Oneness School in Chevy Chase,
Maryland, recently wrote an article for Tomorrow’s Child
Magazine (Fall 2001) about this very subject. In fact, he
came up with four basic goals for a program he calls
“Peacekeeper’s Club.” His goal was to get kids excited
about doing something positive for the world. His four
basic goals for the program are as follows:
1. To
empower students to become conscious contributors to the
world.
2. To
connect students with other students to foster greater
awareness of their common interests, aspirations, and
goals.
3. To
enable students to identify with something positive and
constructive; something that is much larger than
themselves and goes beyond the scope of their individual
lives.
4. To
develop what I call “heart.” Not the muscle beating in our
chest but the capacity for empathy, compassion, and
self-giving.
In his article
Mr. Kutt discusses at length the Peacekeepers program. He
has a whole school that he has founded, at which he runs
this program. I want to discuss, how, on an individual
level, we can teach our own kids, who may or may not be in
an environment that promotes peace, how to be peacemakers,
based on the above principles.
To empower
students (children) to become conscious
contributors to the world
The first thing
to say, that it is my belief that children should be
empowered in every possible situation to draw their own
conclusions. To encourage a child to contribute beyond
the normal scope isn’t easy. It requires some
imagination, and dedication on the part of the parent or
caregiver.
 The
ideal place to start is when a child is 2 or 3 years old.
Start discussing the Earth and where you and your child
live on it. In my case, we have family who live all over
the United States, and as we look through the scrap book
at pictures we also talk about where in the country people
live. Alex is starting to understand that people live in
many different places and life doesn’t revolve around him.
As your child
gets older, you can initiate discussions about cultural
similarities and differences. Hopefully your child goes
to a school where there is a diverse and interesting
population. If not, there are some fantastic shows on the
Discovery channel.
To connect
students with other students to foster greater awareness
of their common interests, aspirations, and goals
Essentially,
this is teaching your child to be a friend. Your child
will completely model what kind of friend you are. It
isn’t easy, but to help your child to connect, you may
need to examine how connected you are to others.
You can also
help your child to understand others by listening to your
child. If you listen to them, they will be able to listen
to others. Once you have heard what they say, repeat it
back to them using their words, so they know you heard
them.
To enable
students to identify with something positive and
constructive; something that is much larger than
themselves and goes beyond the scope of their individual
lives.
 You
can get involved! This can be an activity for your whole
family. Find a charity you can work with together.
Habitat for Humanity always needs help building homes. Or
find something closer to your heart. Serve meals in a
soup kitchen together, sort donated clothes for the local
women’s shelter. It is hard to allow our kids to face the
reality that not everyone is safe and loved, but it will
be easier for them to take if you are by their side
helping them to understand. Obviously this is for older
kids, depending on the maturity level, maybe around ten or
eleven years old.
To develop
what I call “heart.” Not the muscle beating in our chest
but the capacity for empathy, compassion, and self-giving
This is the
hardest. First of all, developmentally, children do not
begin understanding that people feel differently than they
do until around three years old. The discussion can begin
when your child gets their feelings hurt by a friend. The
other day, my son got into an altercation with his best
buddy at school. He stopped wanting to go to school. I
explained to him that his friend probably didn’t realize
that he had hurt Alex’s feelings. Even so, we need to face
our feelings straight on, and until his friend knew his
feelings were hurt, he couldn’t apologize or take
responsibility. We also talked about how Alex might make
someone feel if he pushed him or her. Ultimately we
brought the situation to Alex’s teacher’s attention and
she mediated a little apology session for the two of
them.
Will he learn
compassion from that one incident? Probably not, but he
might remember it the next time he’s about to give someone
a push and think twice about it.
I really
believe it is possible to teach children to be peaceful,
but we have to start young. At two and three years old
children are not too young to begin to take a place in
this world. How can we expect them to be responsible
global citizens if we do everything for them until they
are ‘old enough’ to do it themselves? It is unfair to
expect that a child, just because of how old they are
should automatically ‘feel’ compassionate or self-giving,
unless we have laid a groundwork through not just our
words, but also our actions. Tolerance is a verb, an
activity, not just a word we should pay lip service to on
Sunday.
 
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