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 Life
without TV, Can You Do It?
My column this
week is not only going to be short, but I sent it to my
editor late because I am trying to wean my three year old
and myself off TV. Consequently Alex, my three year old,
had to help me write my column, helped me to dust the
house, insisted on helping with the laundry, and tried to
sweep when I was washing the floors.
Therefore, all
the tasks that I normally get done in a few hours have
taken me the better part of three days. In the middle of
‘work’, as we call it, Alex needs a snack, or a drink or a
bathroom break. I’m still nursing my baby, so he requires
me to sit down and nurse every couple of hours too.
 I
hadn’t realized how much I had come to depend on
Television until I tried to turn it off for a day. It
isn’t easy. I had become used to the noise in the
background and the distraction for Alex. It made life
easier for me and let me accomplish all the tasks that go
with having a house, husband, two kids, three dogs and two
cats. I used to think that I would have more time if I
watched less TV, but in truth I don’t watch it that much.
It kind of provides a background to my life around the
house.
It is however,
a conversation killer. I find that without the television
on my son and I talk more. Have you ever spent time
talking to a three year old? They, or at least my son,
have a very rich life, filled with alligators to tame, Bob
the Builder to follow around and Bears, who live under the
dining room table, to hunt. I gave up trying to get
things done yesterday and gave the whole day over to
playing with Alex and Ian. Ian laughed and giggled at Alex
and I as we shot baskets, read stories, pretended with
Play-Do and colored with Markers and Crayons. It was one
of those beautiful days where the phone didn’t ring, and
there was nowhere to go.
I had whole
weeks like this in the summer when I was a kid. Nothing
set to do, no activities planned, each day stretched ahead
with an adventure just waiting to be discovered. Ellen
Galinsky, author of Ask the Children, recently
spoke on “The Oprah Winfrey Show” about how the
majority of children talk not of vacations and birthdays,
but of the ordinary everyday things that we do as
parents. It is the day to day that gives children their
sense of security and love. It makes sense. Looking at
my own childhood, while I do remember the vacations we
took, what meant the most to me was sitting on the stairs
talking to my Mother. I felt safe, and as if I could tell
her anything in those moments.
 Those
moments can’t be forced, they just sort of happen. I
suppose the key is to be prepared to drop everything when
your child opens up. It isn’t easy in our scheduled,
rigorous, activity filled world. It might mean missing
something that’s important at that moment. Taking in the
bigger picture though, while I don’t remember exactly what
my Mom and I said on the stairs all those years ago, I do
remember how loved I felt. Now that she has died, I can
hold on to those moments.
So while I am
still going to do the laundry and vacuum the carpets, I’m
going to try to leave the TV off more often. I hope Alex
and Ian will have the equivalent of my Mother’s and my
stair talks when they, as my son is fond of saying, “get
bigger and biggerest.”
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